Blake Edwards

“Nothing matters but the facts.  Without them, the science of criminal investigation is nothing more than a guessing game.”

“I reckon this could mean another 10 million at the box office.”

“A miserable newspaper woman wrote something implying that Rock [Hudson] and I spent a lot of time together in San Francisco leather bars.  I loved his response: ‘How in the hell did she find out so quick?’”

“There’s so few people in this town with a conscience.”

“Shame is an unhappy emotion invented by pietists in order to exploit the human race.”

“Before I met Julie [Andrews], some people were conjecturing about her success.  I said: I can tell you what that is.  She has lilacs for pubic hair.”

“Being thrown out of this place is significantly better than being thrown out of a leper colony.”

“Don’t just stand there, idiot.  Call a doctor, and then help me find a nose.”

“If you still want to kill him, do me a favor and take him outside.  Those are new sheets.”

“It’s been my experience that every time I think I know where it’s at, it’s usually somewhere else.”